As a therapist, I spend much of my time helping people understand themselves better. Through my work, I have learned a great deal about ADHD, and over time, I have also begun to recognize many of its characteristics in myself. While I have not received a formal diagnosis, I identify with many of the experiences commonly associated with ADHD. This personal insight, combined with my professional knowledge, has deepened my understanding of both the challenges and strengths that can come with an ADHD brain.
Recognizing ADHD traits in myself has been both enlightening and validating. There have been moments throughout my life when I have struggled with focus, organization, time management, and mental overload. At times, I found myself wondering why tasks that appeared straightforward for others seemed to require so much effort. Learning about ADHD helped me make sense of experiences that I had previously attributed to personal shortcomings or a lack of discipline.
One of the most significant challenges I experience is managing attention. ADHD is often misunderstood as a simple inability to focus, but my experience is different. My attention can be highly active and responsive to multiple stimuli at once. The challenge is not always paying attention; it is directing my attention where it needs to be. My mind is often full of ideas, observations, and connections, which can be both a strength and a source of distraction.
Time management can also be difficult. I may underestimate how long tasks will take, become absorbed in one activity while losing track of another, or struggle to prioritize competing demands. These experiences can create stress, particularly when responsibilities accumulate.
At the same time, I recognize many strengths that are often overlooked in discussions about ADHD. Creativity is one of them. I frequently notice patterns and connections that others may miss, allowing me to approach situations from different perspectives. Curiosity is another strength. When something captures my interest, I can become deeply engaged and highly motivated to learn more.
Perhaps one of the most powerful aspects of ADHD is the capacity for hyperfocus. When my attention aligns with something meaningful or engaging, I can work with remarkable concentration and energy. While hyperfocus can sometimes make it difficult to shift attention elsewhere, it can also be an incredible asset when used intentionally.
As a therapist, these personal experiences have increased my empathy for clients who may be exploring ADHD traits themselves. I understand how confusing it can feel to question whether your experiences fit within a particular framework. I also appreciate the importance of approaching these conversations with curiosity rather than judgment.
When working with clients, I help create a space where they can explore their patterns, challenges, strengths, and questions. Together, we might examine areas such as attention, impulsivity, emotional regulation, organization, and executive functioning. We explore how these experiences affect daily life, relationships, work, and self-esteem.
I often encourage clients to reflect on their lifelong patterns rather than focusing solely on their current difficulties. Many people develop coping strategies that mask ADHD traits for years, particularly in environments where they have learned to compensate effectively. In some cases, these strategies emerge as a form of self-protection. If a person's environment was not encouraging, understanding, or responsive to their needs, they may have learned to work harder, hide their struggles, or constantly adapt in order to meet expectations.
For some, this might look like becoming highly organised to compensate for difficulties with memory or attention. For others, it may involve perfectionism, people-pleasing, overachievement, or expending significant emotional energy to appear as though they are coping. While these strategies can be effective in helping someone navigate daily life, they can also come at a cost, often leading to exhaustion, anxiety, low self-esteem, or a persistent feeling of being misunderstood.
Exploring these lifelong patterns can be incredibly valuable. It allows clients to view their experiences through a lens of understanding rather than self-criticism. Rather than asking, "What's wrong with me?" they can begin asking, "What have I needed all along?" This shift often creates space for greater self-compassion and can help determine whether a formal ADHD assessment, or simply a deeper understanding of their unique way of functioning, may be beneficial.
One lesson I have learned personally and professionally is the importance of focus. Focus is not simply about concentration; it is about intentionally directing energy toward what matters most. For individuals with ADHD traits, focus often requires support, structure, and self-awareness rather than willpower alone.
There are several strategies that I have found helpful and frequently discuss with clients:
Breaking large tasks into smaller, manageable steps can reduce overwhelm and make it easier to begin. Starting is often the hardest part, and smaller goals create momentum.
Creating routines and external systems can support executive functioning. Calendars, reminders, written lists, and visual cues help reduce the mental burden of trying to remember everything.
Managing distractions is another important strategy. Creating environments that support concentration can make a significant difference in productivity and well-being.
Using focused work periods with planned breaks can help sustain attention and prevent mental exhaustion. Structured approaches to time management often work better than relying on motivation alone.
Most importantly, I encourage both myself and my clients to practice self-compassion. Many people with ADHD traits have spent years feeling frustrated with themselves for struggling in ways that others do not seem to. Replacing self-criticism with understanding can be transformative.
My experience of recognizing ADHD traits in myself has strengthened my ability to support others who may be on a similar journey. Whether someone ultimately receives a diagnosis or not, exploring these experiences can provide valuable insight into how their mind works. Understanding ourselves more fully allows us to build on our strengths, address our challenges, and develop strategies that help us thrive.
ADHD is often discussed in terms of deficits, but that perspective tells only part of the story. Alongside the challenges can come creativity, resilience, curiosity, adaptability, and unique ways of thinking. By understanding both the difficulties and the strengths, we can move beyond labels and focus on helping people live more effectively, authentically, and compassionately with the minds they have.
Alongside exploring patterns and developing self-understanding, I also encourage clients to engage in activities that support regulation, focus, and overall well-being. Creative activities can be particularly beneficial for individuals with ADHD traits, as they provide an outlet for expression, curiosity, and problem-solving. Whether it is art, writing, music, knitting, crocheting, gardening, crafting, or any other creative pursuit, these activities can help channel energy in meaningful and rewarding ways while fostering a sense of achievement and enjoyment.
Regular physical exercise is another valuable tool. Movement can help regulate attention, reduce stress, improve mood, and support cognitive functioning. Exercise does not need to be intense or structured to be effective; a daily walk, dancing, yoga, swimming, or spending time outdoors can all have a positive impact. Finding a form of movement that feels enjoyable rather than another task to complete is often the key to making it sustainable.
I also encourage simple mindfulness practices. Mindfulness is sometimes misunderstood as needing to sit still and clear the mind, which can feel daunting or unrealistic for many people with ADHD traits. Instead, I often suggest accessible practices such as focusing on the sensations of a walk, paying attention to the rhythm of breathing for a few moments, noticing sounds in the environment, or engaging fully in a creative activity. These small moments of awareness can help individuals reconnect with the present, reduce overwhelm, and create a greater sense of calm.
Ultimately, my goal is not to help clients become someone different but to help them understand themselves more fully. By combining self-awareness with practical strategies, supportive routines, creativity, movement, and self-compassion, individuals can learn to work with their minds rather than against them. Often, it is through this process of understanding and acceptance that meaningful and lasting change begins.
If you recognised parts of yourself in this article, you are not alone. Whether you are exploring ADHD traits for the first time or have been navigating these experiences for years, understanding yourself more deeply can be a powerful first step.
You do not need to have all the answers. Sometimes simply becoming curious about your patterns, strengths, and challenges can open the door to meaningful change.
If you would like support in exploring your experiences, therapy can provide a safe and compassionate space to better understand how your mind works and discover strategies that help you thrive.
Get in touch to arrange an initial conversation and begin your journey towards greater self-awareness, self-compassion, and wellbeing.
Mihaela Marian
MBACP Counsellor